Today dawned with an awful realization. Beginning tomorrow, I have to start working from an office again, and that can only mean one thing: business casual.Business casual is distinctly different from work-from-home casual, in many unfortunate ways. Business casual requires the all-day-long wearing of a real bra. Business casual forbids one from wearing T-Shirts emblazoned with slogans such as "REAL TITS" and "I'm a MILF". Lastly, business casual does not permit the wearing of pajama pants advertising Dr. Pepper or Guinness until noon, then switching over to jeans.
There was only one option for me today. I had to go shopping, and I had to buy stuff. This is really not how I wanted to spend my day, and I'd already penciled in the field trials for my Sunday amusement. But no, I had to go attempt to cobble together a work-appropriate wardrobe that wouldn't make me look like a hoochie or a Golden Girl, but something in-between.
I won't bore you with the details, but suffice it to say that I found enough mediocre crap to upholster myself for the next four business days, and thankfully, Friday is casual day, so I'm set for that. Although it's not really possible that this Friday will be anywhere near as casual as the many Fridays that preceded it. In any case, there's more shopping ahead in the coming days, a prospect I'm regarding with the sort of dread usually reserved for root canals and anal surgeries.
In other news, G spent the better part of this morning working on his brick-laying project, and made some visible progress. More disturbingly, he is now removing the ceiling from my former office to run cable for the purpose of re-wiring the downstairs television. My mantra that keeps me from going nuts during such initiatives is, "At least he doesn't chase women and gamble.", I just wish he'd take up cooking as a hobby instead of tearing the house apart at random intervals.
Serenity now. Serenity now. Serenity now.
10 comments:
I wish you did not have to go back to the office, I know how much you liked working from home.
Now don't go on any "basesh" my v. word for my comment.
I hope you are not expecting the weather we are going to have starting tonight. A mixture of rain , freezing rain, sleet and snow or ice. Stay warm. Give my love to all of your men. Hugs~~~
Oh God Addie...You know how this ends, right? HOOCHIE MAMA!! Uh, please tell me I didn't take the Seinfeld reference too far, thanks. And P.S., I wonder if everyone knows you're not even a little bit kidding about the t-shirt slogans.
It's alright, Mom. I should probably get out of the house more. And wear a bra. :-)
Alisonian, I'm cracking up! I think you took the Seinfeld reference to its only logical conclusion, and did it tastefully, which is more than I can say for those completely non-fictional t-shirts. Let that be our battle cry, "HOOCHIE MAMA!!"!
There is always a bright side- at least you were not shopping with a two-year old in tow ( which is truly comparable to hot pokers to the eye.)
Here's hoping tomorrow goes better than you expect.
I hate shopping too! Maybe we should do it together some time.
Jen
I had already chiseled your "no-show" in stone by 10. I knew better, especially since we didn't get above 40 until 2pm.
A Bra what is that? What an uplifting thought. Love you, Honey ! ;^0
Just say no to Chico's!
I hate business casual. There's nothing freaking casual about it. I miss the dot-com days when I could show up at the office in flop-flops, jeans and a t-shirt... not so emblazoned as your own, and no one even noticed. Today I don't think security would even let me in the bank wearing that. Hmmm, there's a thought. The moment I get home (well after letting the pups out) I'm back into comfy clothes, and suddenly I'm happy again.
Holy Cow, Garth can burp louder than most people I know... obviously he's my dog :-)
Hope Monday was better than you thought.
I think you should wear one of those t-shirts to work and report back promptly :)
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